Today I happened upon a nice little list on DailyFinance on things you should and should not buy at the dollar store. Many of you may or may not know but The Guy is a frequent dollar store shopper. It’s not because I can’t afford any place else…..well it’s kind of because I can’t afford any place else but also because you can get some really good deals at the dollar store. There are definitely some things you should steer clear of but I don’t see anything wrong with a little dollar store shopping. So I went ahead and prepared a quick lists of do’s and don’ts of dollar store shopping. I present to you: The Guys Guide To Dollar Store Shopping.
· Toothpaste, deodorant, laundry detergent, etc - You can go ahead and buy any type of grooming/cleaning supply at the dollar store. They are all the same shit just different names. You might feel awkward using “Old Spicey” after the gym or “Swuave” when you are cleaning your hair but no one else needs to know. It all smells the same.
· Plates, cups, knives, forks, general eating utensils – You aren’t going to get high end stuff at the dollar store but if you are already considering buying these things at the dollar store than obviously you don’t give a shit about that! Pull the trigger! Nothing says class like 10 plates for a dollar. Great for starter apartments and the man who likes to say “I just don’t give a shit what people think about me.”
· Socks – The only clothing you can buy at a dollar store is socks. Nothing else. Want to know why? Because they are in bags. Homeless people can’t come in and rub their soulless hands all over socks in a bag. They aren’t trying on socks in a bag to see if they fit right. Plus do you really want to be wearing dollar store shirts?...Dollar store sweat pants are acceptable.
· Break-Kats – I know what you are thinking “What the fuck is a Break-Kat The Guy?” It’s the dollar store version of a Kit-Kat bar. You can get a bag full of them for just a dollar and they taste just like the real thing! Amazing!
· Medicine- I mean sure a one dollar bottle of ibuprofen sounds awesome right? It sure did to me when I bought it and took it to work. I popped two of those bad boys and an hour later I was feeling real woozy. I thought I was going to die via medicine that I bought to ease my pain. Ironic….that is ironic right? That damn medicine messed with my head
· DVD’s- Dollar store DVD’s are tricky when you are a kid. They try to name their DVD’s after popular movies at the time. You think you are going home with Aladdin but when you get home you quickly realize you are watching Aladdon. Which is just like Aladdin but poorly animated, Apu is a gorilla instead of a small monkey, genie speaks in an Arabic accent, and Aladdon is Italian instead of Steve from Full House. Yikes
· Anything Technology Related- The dollar store isn’t a dollar store because they have the latest technology. They are a dollar store because everything they have, no one wanted. So those awesome Redelicious headphones might seem like a steal at a dollar but they aren’t. That may look like a cheap car adapter for your iPhone but in reality it’s just a plastic shell of let downs. If you want cheap technology……go to Walmart….the dollar store is not the place.
· Steak – So the dollar store I usually go to has recently put up a sign that says “Steak: 99 cent/ lb” and I thought…. “Who would buy steak at the dollar store?” Then I thought back to high school lunches. That meat had to come from somewhere and it certainly wasn’t a grocery store. If that isn’t dollar store meat then I don’t know what is. I ate it then…can’t see why I wouldn’t eat it now? Guess I’ll just have to try it and see…..