Friday, December 30, 2011

Year In Review: The Guy Gives A Lesson On Text Slang

Originally Posted October 11th



I don’t know if it’s just The Guy getting old or whatever but there are some things I just don’t understand anymore. Today’s blog brings to light “text speak” or text abbreviations or whatever you want to call them. It seems like each day I get a text with a new abbreviation that I don’t understand and I have to Google it. Such things as “SMH”, “IMO”, “HMU”, and “TBH”. IDK (see what I did there?) how these came to be but I think there should be a meeting held and an official report released before these can be used in everyday texting life. It seems like just anyone can make up these text slang words and have them be used by everyone. So that got The Guy to thinking. I think you know from experience that this is never good news. Anyway, since I’ve been on a list kick as of late, I came up with a list of text slang that I will now be using on a daily basis. No use in prolonging it lets just jump right in!
1)      LTM- Laughing To Myself (More or Less a Demetri Martin Rip-Off)
2)      WTAYC- What Time Are You Coming?
3)      RA- Right Away
4)      OI- On It
5)      ATM- At The Movies
6)      IIWII – It Is What It Is
7)      B2KANC- B2K And Nick Cannon
8)      YTTGTFT- You Trying To Go To Friendly’s Tonight?
9)      HOICSJLMGHAGSC- Hold On I’m Coming Soon Just Let Me Go Home And Grab Some Clothes
10)   DYWHIMYMLN- Did You Watch “How I Met Your Mother” Last Night?
11)   IDCWYSMWITGOAA- I Don’t Care What You Say, Mark Wahlberg Isn’t That Good Of An Actor!
12)   DYSTGLNWAUCBJHUWH- Did You See That Girl Last Night? What An Uggo! Can’t Believe Jake Hooked Up With Her!
13)   ABOUAGTTWSWYC- A Bunch Of Us Are Getting Together To Watch “Still Waiting…” You Coming?
14)   FDBSSSSSS- Fuck Da Bearssssss!
15)   SDIWSHDYNGTWIDRTAFOYTATITMSB- Sorry Dude I was Sleeping. How Did You Not Get That When I Didn’t Respond To All Four Of Your Texts At Three In The Morning? Still Boys?
I know what you’re thinking. “Come on The Guy, Those are all pretty obvious” We’ll here’s where it gets confusing. Of course I’m not just creating my own but changing the meanings of other ones because people tend to do that too.
1)      LOL- Used to mean “Laughing Out Loud” now means “Love Our Lost.” I think it’s important to still love things even after they die. Don’t get confused when I say: “My dad ran over my dog and killed him LOL”
2)      IDC- Used to mean “I Don’t Care” now means “I’m Definitely Crying.” The Guy wears his emotions on his sleeve. So what? Don’t get confused when I say: “Your grandma died? IDC”
3)      IDK- Used to mean “I Don’t Know” now means “I Did! we are about to go Kayaking.” What can I say? I love impromptu kayaking trips! Don’t get confused when I say: “Did I pick your kids up from school? IDK”
4)      ILU- Used to mean “I Love You” now means “I Lost my Underwear”. It happens a lot. The Guy is embarrassed. Don’t get confused when I say: “I’m embarrassed to say that ILU dude. I’ve been in the closet for while but I can’t find what I’m looking for. Can you come over and help me?”
5)      DTF- Used to mean Down To Fuck? Now means Down To Fence? The Guy likes to get a good joust in every now and again. Don’t get confused when I say: “DTF bro? Sword fights are always fun!”
There you go. Memorize that list because when The Guy texts you he doesn’t want any confusion. Feel free to use them with your friends! You’re welcome.
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